Monday, October 19, 2009

stop this train

i'm so happy the rain went away. I thoroughly enjoyed the sun today.

my weekend was pretty good. i went to visit my best friend in north philly FINALLY. she bought this house in august and i have been trying to visit her for so long. i also had my other close friend visit from nashville and it was awesome to see her as usual.

today is just a stressful day. i am really struggling trying to figure out what it is exactly that i want to do. I can't settle with a major and when I think of a career outside of college I am completely confused. nothing seems to be exciting for me and my advisor made everything worse by just making me realize how i have no clue what the fuck i am doing.

so.. i spent the rest of the day bugging out. I'm really worried I will end up transferring again which would be a huge pain in the ass especially because i really like dvc and living in doylestown with my two roommates. but what if i can't settle with a major at dvc? do i settle for something i only kind of like or do i transfer... again... and lose credits and be in school until i'm 30. my first reason for transferring to dvc was because i thought i'd find a major but i feel like every second i am changing my mind and nothing seems to be working out.

i guess i'm just trying to figure out my future and coming up with absolutely nothing. it's kind of bullshit though am i honestly supposed to figure out what i want to do for the rest of my life at 20? I sure hope not.

Friday, October 2, 2009


I feel like I've been majorly slacking with the blog updates. I really have nothing to say!
My birthday was last weekend. It was a REALLY good birthday. consisted of lots of good food, friends and family, and my brother getting lost in brooklyn... but thats a long story.

it's 245 on Friday and I'm tiredddd. Tonight my grandparents want to take me out to dinner, which is nice. Theyre really cute old people... sometimes old people are really scary. After dinner I am going to my older sister's house. Shes having a big BBQ tomorrow and she wants me there briiiigggghtttt and early to help set up.

I dont think I love anything more than a BBQ. it's just the best food in my opinion.

my roommate is currently watching project runway. I feel bad because I always go home on weekends instead of spending it with my roommates. Well my one roommate sophie is from vermont and always stays here in doylestown obviously but my other roommate elyse always goes home to CT so sophie is just left alone all the time. I feel bad but i'm sure she keeps herself entertained.

I watched a documentary last night on that neglected girl from the 70's named Genie. The one who was isolated in a room for 10 years of her life and was found at 13.. I have read a lot on her but watching the documentary was so crazy being able to put a face to the name. Seeing what can happen with no human contact can have on someone is crazy. It was just kind of disturbing i guess. It makes me really sad watching her life story and how she ended up just dying in a mental hospital because no one could fund her recovery anymore. So ... thats uplifting.

I need to nap and not blog.